Are you your own worst critic? Does your mind go over weaknesses or mistakes you made again and again? Do setbacks or criticism stop you in your tracks? Do you have a hard time saying no? Does asking for what you need make you feel guilty?
If you answered yes to any of these questions, it’s time for a self-love tune-up!
Practicing self-love is an integral part of your intuition. When you feel good about yourself, approve of who you are and the choices you are making, your intuitive channels are clear. You can easily hear the whispers of your soul, moving you in the direction toward your heart’s desires. On the other side, if you don’t approve of yourself, your ego (or Critter Mind as I like to call it) will start to chirp and add to your story, reminding you of all your past mistakes and shortcomings.
I grew up in a house where both my parents would say, “What’s wrong with you?” anytime my sisters or I made a mistake. I learned that making mistakes was not a good thing and began to disconnect from my intuition and the world around me. Disapproving of myself became my self-talk and my self-assurance began to fade. It was like being stuck in a cage of my own making. And, trust me, you don’t want that!
Self-assurance and self-love involve making a choice to value and approve of yourself, your choices and your life - no matter what. From my experiences growing up, I began to focus more on my perceived weaknesses rather than my own strengths. I had a belief that I needed to be perfect to be loved and accepted and nothing could be further from the truth. No one is perfect and once I removed that block, I began to focus on what was going right in my world and was able to reframe the stories in my mind to support my self-acceptance, love and happiness.
When you learn to celebrate who you are and the life you’re living, you realize that you don’t have to prove yourself to anyone or defend your choices. You know that when things don’t go according to play, there is always something to learn and you get to choose again. Your intuition is quick to show you the fastest way to make your dreams a reality, show you how to forgive yourself and others and most importantly, laugh at yourself!
By loving and approving of YOU, you are fully awake and fully connected to the world around you in a way that lights you up. And, when you make the choice to focus on your strengths, your intuition will guide you every time.
3 Steps for More Self-Love
Self-assurance involves celebrating your strengths and achievements. I invite you to make a LONG list of all the things you’ve ever done that make you proud. Every win, every wonderful thing you can thing of. How you showed up when you wanted to quit, how you make sure your kids, family or friends always have a shoulder to lean on. How do you make people feel? Do you like to make sure everyone feels included? Are you great at managing your money or time? Pay close attention to the last 2 years and really notice all the amazing strengths you have and all of the wonderful things you’ve accomplished, no matter how small! Read this list for the next 3 weeks and continue to celebrate YOU!
Take Charge of Your Mind!
I invite you to become a witness of your thoughts. Learn to just acknowledge them without judgement. You may notice you say certain things over and over all day and this is creating your reality. When you catch yourself saying, or thinking, something negative, reframe it into something you want to be true for you. Our minds cannot tell between a thought that is real and one that is not. So, I encourage you to only think and speak words and ideas that you would like to have in your world. A few years ago, I caught myself saying, “I’m so tired” and realized I repeated this to myself countless times a day. And, guess what? I was tired! So, I began to reframe with, “I’m feeling more and more energized every day.” And, pretty soon, that became my new reality.
Find ways to fill your mind with goodness – prayer, reading inspirational books or messages, uplifting music, have a dialog with the universe through Oracle Cards, mantras and any way that directs your thoughts in a powerful way.
This is my go-to for stopping the critter mind and strengthening your intuition. If your mind is really busy, you can start with guided mediations to begin and then move onto relaxing music and even breath work. When we focus on our breath, our body and mind instantly begin to relax so a wonderful practice is to breathe in for the count of 8, hold for the count of 8, and release for the count of 8. Giving yourself even 5 minutes a day to slow down your mind and invite your intuition in, will have a profound impact on your self-assurance!
And, please share your thoughts on self-assurance! I’d love to hear what you’re most proud of - remember we’re all connected and learning from one another. And, I’d also like to invite you to let me know if there is a subject you’d like me to write about, as I’d love to write something meaningful for you.
Looking at each card, take a deep breath in and exhale. Do this 3 times and welcome the nurturing energies into your heart.
Do you make a conscious choice to be happy? Or, do the outer experiences, energies and thought forms pull you from your joy? This card is a beautiful reminder that we have done so much inner work and now is time for us to experience joy and happiness on all levels. Give yourself permission to feel joy and allow your spirit to play! Sometimes we can get caught up in the mundane day-to-day obligations and responsibilities, and loose sight of our need to celebrate life in any way we can. I invite you to think of ways you can have more fun this month - new tunes, ice cream by the river, anticipating warmer weather, planning a trip... enjoy the lighter energies this month!
Sometimes it can seem like we aren't making any progress or seeing our heart's desires come to life. Now is a time to look at things with a different perspective. As my guides remind me - "Be mindful of how you tell the story, because you'll get to be right." I would find myself hanging onto an old story and in doing so, would prevent the universe from gifting me with the energies, resources or anything else that might assist my journey.
It's okay to set something aside until more information is ready. When I find myself at a crossroads, where nothing seems to be working, I'll give myself permission to leave it for a while and I'll ask my angels and guides to show me a new possibility. Just like watching a cake bake, our impatience (ego) won't make it bake faster! The same goes for our dreams and soul growth. Give yourself time to regroup.
I love the energy of this card! By slowing down and taking notice of how things ARE working out for you, you will align with more synchronicities and good fortune. By staying focused on what is working - seeing it done, feeling into the energy of it complete, trusting that your prayers will be answered, the universe can quickly move in and bring you that special person, that new opportunity or a new insight to fill your heart with love. Remember, you are co-creating with life and when you align with universal energies through gratitude, you will witness more and more magic. Your angels and guides are just waiting to shower you with love, possibilities and all things joyful!
From the Wisdom of the Oracle Deck - one of my favourite decks!
Shauna Marie Chandler
Reiki Master/Teacher, Angel Readings, Sacred Geometry